


my favorite version of me disappeared through longer day and shorter years

by natashasbarnes



Category: Marvel, Marvel Comics
Genre: Bucky Barnes - Freeform, F/M, James "Bucky" Barnes - Freeform, MCU didn't give us BuckyNat and I'm still pissed about it, Marvel - Freeform, Natasha Romanoff - Freeform, buckynat - Freeform, natasha romanov - Freeform, winterwidow - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-15 20:42:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29814123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/natashasbarnes/pseuds/natashasbarnes
Summary: Natasha was just reading at a cafe when in came James Barnes. They chat and discuss their lives and their friends. The two find comfort in each other. songs lyrics from: When I Wasn't Watching by Mandy Moore.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Natasha Romanov, James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov
Kudos: 7





	my favorite version of me disappeared through longer day and shorter years

Natasha sat in the dark Russian cafe reading her book. Her family used to take her and her sister here all the time. Not her actual family, no they were long gone. It was her first family that took her here. They took her and her sister, Yelena, in at a young age. It had been a while since Natasha last spoke to her family and she wasn't planning on doing it anytime soon. They were in the past and Natasha only wanted to focus on the future. She never looked back and she probably won't ever look back at something in her life.

Her red was covering the side of her face like it always did. Natasha loved to hide her face from the public. Clint always jokes that she probably was an assassin on the run from the government. Natasha always rolled her eyes at his jokes. Listen, she loves Clint to death and would die for him, but the guy is possibly the biggest idiot she knows. 

She and Clint share an apartment that her friends nicknamed "The Love Shack" because people are always shacking up there. The motto for The Love Shack is whatever happens in The Love Shack stays in the The Love Shack. The whole friend group have all basically slept with each other with the exception of Clint and Nat. Nat and Clint have a brother and sister relationship, which was rare in a friendship that had the bed hopping skills of a polygamous marriage. 

Natasha always left The Love Shack in the morning to get her coffee and get some peace and quiet before Clint woke up or before Tony or Thor barged into their apartment to hang out. 

Natasha loved to read books at the cafe and made it a goal to read at least one chapter a day. Today she was reading the Russian novel _The Master and Margarita_. She was intrigued by the cover as a kid, but never had enough money to buy the book. She was so happy to see the book sitting in the window of her favorite book store. 

She quietly read her book while drinking her coffee. Reading in the morning was refreshing to her because she had never felt so calm and relaxed in year. No one could take her early mornings away from her. 

"I love that book," an unfamiliar voice said. 

Natasha turned her head and saw a man around her age pointing to the book she was reading. Natasha analyzed the man standing beside her. She always analyzed people and her friends hated it. They hated that Natasha was always right about people and the fact that she would rub it into her face. When she met Thor's brother Loki, she instantly knew he was a broken man who acted tough to hide his sorrows which is why she sympathized with him. When she met Clint's, now boyfriend, Phil, she knew he was the opposite of Clint. He was serious and smart, but she knew he was perfect for Clint. She knew he would stop Clint from committing a crime that would leave Clint on house arrest. Natasha was careful and she had every right to be. She knew what the real world was like and it was cruel and unkind. She was protective of her friends and would do anything to save them.

"I read it when I went abroad to Russia," the man said. He smiled and extended his hand toward Nat. "I'm James Barnes."

Natasha looked at his hand before carefully shaking it. "Romanov. Natasha Romanov," she introduced before letting go of his hand. 

"It's nice to meet you, Natasha," he said. "Can I sit down?" he asked her. 

Natasha nodded her head and put her book down. She took another glance at the man and really noticed his full face. He had short brown hair with steel blue eyes and a scar on his right cheek. Natasha must have been staring at it for a little too long because he noticed her staring at it and pointed to it.

"I was in war," James explained. "My buddy and I just came back home not too long ago. The wounds are still pretty fresh. When I had a little of alone time, I read _The Master and Margarita_." 

Natasha nodded before finally speaking up. "I always wanted to read it, but I was too poor to afford it. I saw it in the window of my book store and I just had to buy it." 

"Yeah I get that," he said. "I'm from Brooklyn and my ma had to take care of me and my four siblings. I was the oldest, so when I was old enough, I got a job to support us all."

Natasha sympathetically smiled. She knows what it is like to grow up sooner than the rest of the kids. After her parents died, she had to learn to take care of herself and survive out on the cold Russian streets.

"I joined the war about three years ago. My ma freaked and didn't talk to me for days. I understood, you know. Couldn't be easy for. Her son was leaving to possibly get severely injured or worst dead. She came around and made sure I was ok. She drove me to the airport and then my pal and I left and didn't come back for three years," James said. He didn't know why, but speaking to Natasha was refreshing, Even though he just met her, he felt like he could tell her anything. "War really takes a toll on you. You don't come back as the same person you were when you left." 

James looked up to her and saw she was giving him a sympathetic look. He awkwardly chuckled. "I don't know why I'm spilling my guts to a complete stranger. There's something great about you that I felt the need to vent my problems to you. I'm sorry, ma'am."

"It's ok," Natasha reassured "I wasn't in war, but I did have a war with myself. My parents died when I was really young and I didn't have a family. I was alone on the streets of Russia trying my hardest to survive. The winters were cold and dark and the summers were hot and dry. It was really hard to get work especially at a young age. A small family took me under their wing. Once I was old enough to leave Russia, I left and never turned to look back at it. I haven't talked to the family in years and I don't plan to. They're my past and I want to focus on the now." Natasha had never talked to her friends about this. Maybe because they're too busy sleeping together in Clint's bedroom. 

"I moved here and met a guy named Clint Barton in a job I had just started working in. We became the best of friends and now we live in a small apartment we call 'The Love Shack,'" Natasha slightly chuckles.

"Why 'The Love Shack?'" James lightly laughs. 

"Because our friend group has the sex drive of bunnies," Nat explains. "The motto for the 'The Love Shack' is 'whatever happens in The Love Shack stays in The Love Shack." 

"Well your friend group is sounds absolutely charming. My friends consists of Sam, Steve, and Peggy and let me tell you, it isn't always sunshine and rainbows. They don't have the sex drive of bunnies like your group, but they are extremely righteous. They love sticking up for the little guy and it can be exhausting. When they come to visit, there's always a fresh bruise or a new cut because someone pulled a knife. Before my best bud, Steve, was the size he is now, he used to fight guys ten times bigger than him and I always had to jump in and help him out," James laughs recalling the memories. 

"Well we need to bring them by The Love Shack. Is this Steve tall and muscular perhaps?" Natasha asks. 

"Yeah he is, but he wasn't always. He used to be a skinny, five-four kid with asthma," James described his buddy.

"Well if he's tall, he would be perfect for The Love Shack. My friend, Tony Stark would love him. Tony is five-nine and loves taller men. I can't say who he was with in The Love Shack, but he certainly did once sleep with a six-three blond giant," Natasha recalls the time Tony slept with the tallest member of the friend group.

"Maybe we'll stop by," James said. 

"You should. There's no rules in The Love Shack. Whatever happens in there, happens in there," Natasha smirks at James. James smirks back at her. The two of them stare at each other. Natasha bites her lip and smiles.

Natasha's phone repeatedly buzzes and sees a message from Clint.

_Clint_

_I maybe almost started a fire in the kitchen._

_IT WASN'Y MY FAUTLT I WAS LOOKING FOR MY HEARING AID AND I FORGOT I WAS MAKING PANCAKES._

_Phil is giving me a disappointed look._

_NATASHA COME HOME BEFORE PHIL BREAKS UP WITH ME._

_Phil is now giving me a lecture about responsibility._

_Natasha he's boring me so much. Now I wish the apartment set on fire._

_NATASHAAAAAAA COME HOME._

_Read 10:38 A.M._

Natasha didn't want to leave, but she knew it was time to go home. 

"I have to go. My friend nearly burnt down the apartment making pancakes," Natasha explains putting her book in her purse. 

"It was really nice to meet you. Thank you for letting me vent," James says.

"No problem."

"If it's ok with you, may I have your number?" James asks.

Natasha doesn't even think about it and grabs her phone out. She hands James her phone for him to put his number in. Once he does, he gets his phone out and gives it to her. Natasha types her number in and give James back his phone, making sure her hand slightly touches his. 

"See you around, James," she says with a smile. 

"See you around, Natasha," James says. Natasha turns around and leaves with a smile on her face. Once she leaves the cafe, she turns to take another look at James making it the first time Natasha looked back at something in her life. 


End file.
